All the holiday needed was 'yackety sax' on repeat

Bev from Sunday Stealing regularly poses a list of questions that exhausted bloggers can use as a spring board for reminiscing, opining or just pausing to have a bit of a think.

1. What is the farthest you have ever traveled?

Being an Aussie, if you ventured further than New Zealand or Bali you were already considered an intrepid traveler.  Adelaide, South Australia to Aberdeen, Scotland might have been the furthest, if specifically counting kilometres.  It was also my first flight as an excited twelve year old in December 1980. In those days you could press the 'summon flight attendant' button and they would actually arrive. I wore that thing out - and the hostie - and overdosed on fanta, peanuts and toblerones. This resulted in my mother holding my hair out of my face as I puked it all back up during our stopover in Bahrain.

2. Who did you date while in high school?

Only at the very end of my final year.  I kissed a boy during a drama camp a couple of years earlier. We each wrote each other one awkward letter but I used this as 'my boyfriend who lives in Clare' excuse for at least another year to avoid the embarrassment of being rejected by any more closely located males.

By year twelve, I was ready to risk things and Sean and I went as partners to our senior ball.  We dated for nearly three years, so for a first boyfriend he was a pretty decent pick.

3. What is one of the worst trips you've ever taken? What went wrong?

Oh lordy....... Egypt for Christmas in 1991.  Leonie and I were young Aussies in London and thought that a fortnight in Egypt flying via Romanian airlines would be a marvelous idea.  We were stranded for twenty four hours in the post-communism, still-inept Bucharest airport which appeared to be a shed sitting on a sheet of ice.  Blocked toilets, no heating, staff who pulled down the blinds over the 'help desk' if we dared approach and only 'toblerone' (there seems to be a theme here) and Romanian champagne to eat if you had some cash.  Most of us deciding that getting drunk on dodgy fizz was the way to cope.

Egypt wasn't much better.  We wore wedding rings and said that our husbands were still in London, dressed very modestly and covered our hair.  This did not deter the ardor or bravado of the local gentlemen and our tour of the interior of the Cheops pyramid involved me trying to reach around to slap the face of the paid tour guide who was pinching my arse.  We emerged into the daylight only to be propositioned by a fourteen year old boy and having to make a run for it after our camel ride turned ugly. Most of the trip seemed to pass by in a haze of being the female extras in a never-ending Benny Hill skit.

4. How do you like to spend a lazy day?

Lockdown has made those lazy day options a year-long one here in France.  Making and drinking good coffee. Cuddling and walking Felix.  Cuddling but not walking my husband Dean.  Kneading bread dough.  Clicking onto the third episode of a Netflix series that you already have a good feeling about. Reading a good book. Facetiming with my daughter.

5. How old were you when you found out that JFK had been assassinated? How did it affect you?

Before my time and very rarely mentioned in my rural South Australian upbringing.  The price of petrol, getting a new Woolworths complex and trying not to wet my pants when the Murray River Bunyip roared at me were our bigger concerns.

This guy was scary!

6. Who has been one of the most important people in your life?

My paternal grandfather, John H Read.  He died at ninety three and remained kind, thoughtful, open-minded and generous right up to the last second. His humour, energy and legendary sweet tooth will never be forgotten.  He once said of my cricket mad, reading-averse brother, "I was going to give you a book but you've already got one."

My grandfather in the 1930s

7. What is one trait you would most like to improve in yourself?

Eliminating envy. Most people might write something like having more self control over food, booze or other vices or perhaps procrastinate less and I readily identify with both of those yearnings.  Envy or plain old jealousy, sadly, has been a really ugly aspect of my psyche that's easy to stir up. Sometimes it's a struggle to take a breath and apply empathy and congratulations before the nasty pin pricks of 'why can't it be me...' eat up my insides.  How I wish it wasn't so.

8. Did you date someone in college?

The bloke I met in my last year of high school mentioned above.  After that ended, my remaining year had some dalliances but nothing resembling a 'relationship.'

9. What was your dream car?

Do you really want to ask this question and get this fifty something old bag ready for a rant?

Firstly, it was anything that worked, because for most of us, our first car is an old bomb we're thrilled to own because it's ours and gives us freedom.  For me that was a 1971 Renault in 1989.

After that, it was marriage, and a child and several interstate moves.  Cars are shockingly expensive in Australia, so we never ever bought one brand new.  Drops in value the second you drive it off the lot, and so forth.  In Switzerland, aged in our mid-forties, Dean and I bought our first brand new car and were pleasantly surprised at how little it cost compared to what it would be priced in Oz.  However, that 'brand new' car is now considered ancient here as it turns ten years old.  We'll keep driving this hardy little Peugeot 207 for as long as we can.

10. Did you have a family member you wish you'd gotten to know better?

My maternal grandparents.  They died a year apart when I was eight and nine years old. My memories of them are all good ones, but fleeting. Peppermints, tomato plants, watching ABC news, being tucked into WW2 trestle beds extra tightly, which I loved.

11. Tell me about your greatest gardening success.

My mother, who has the gift of a green thumb.  Years ago, on a long drive from Melbourne to Adelaide, we were playing 'guess who.'  It was Dean's turn to pose a question to then-four year old daughter. "Who is wrinkled and is good with plants?"

She had only seen the movie ET the night before and that was the answer she was supposed to give, but 'GRANDMA!' was the name she triumphantly shouted out.

Unfortunately, my mother did not pass on any of her gardening skills to me. I can't even keep supermarket basil alive.   

12. What was your Dad like when you were a child?

He was brilliant. Loving, funny, interested in everything, kind, quirky, intelligent. I tried to do him justice here - https://kathlockett.medium.com/a-love-letter-to-my-eighty-year-old-dad-decd2157ccc0

13. What is the best job you've ever had?

Don't think I've found it yet.  Freelance writing is good on a personal level but it's dishonest to say that when Dean has the 'real' day job that is reliable, gives satisfactory perks and pays the bills.  

14. What are your favorite songs?

This varies from mood to mood, day to day.  The Gary Jules version of 'Mad World' literally stops me in my tracks every single time I hear it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DHtcliIvnHI

15. If you could choose any talents to have, what would they be?

The ability to make people laugh; give them some immediate joy but without hurting anyone else to do it. Who doesn't want a good, uncomplicated belly laugh with a friend?